life. its what you make it

This week has been absolutely bizarre. To be honest, I had moments where I seriously considered packing up and driving home. Why? I am not even quite sure. I just know that I wasn't happy. Apparently I have some sort of transitional anxiety disorder... whatever that means.  What I do know is that I was sick of being unhappy. So, I decided I was going to be happy. I was going to get out of my room and do something with other people, even though I didn't really want to. My two friends Tori and Allison have been such peaches;) They let me tag along their FHE group all the time. First the Avengers, then Big Jud's, then THOR. Basically I just love those girls. Anyways, I have really think life is what you make it. I can choose to feel insecure, frustrated, and overwhelmed. OR I can tackle those feelings head on and figure why I am bombarded with them.

I am not going to pretend like all my problems disappeared overnight. They did not. It is still hard for me to look people in the eye on campus and smile, because what if they do not smile back? I do not handle rejection well. But, I learned that if I smiled to enough people on my way to class, I was usually in a pretty good mood by the time I got to class, because I had been smiling so much.

It gets better. It gets easier too! Little by little, day by day.  Some (and I stress SOME) of my classes are so awesome that I am excited to go to class.   I am learning to live with the others -  (cough cough Math needs to die cough cough).

This girl next to me? Yeah she is pretty cool. She deals with my deep belly laughs with my snorting when I laugh too hard. She lets me shamelessly use her three hole puncher, and she goes to Pizza Pie Cafe with me even though she hates pizza. She has this way of magically making me pay attention in Doctrine and Covenants when I really do not want to. She listens to my endless rants about pointless meaningless things ( I DO mean endless) Oh, and she is my new work out buddy. Basically she is awesome. Somebody has to be pretty special to be able to handle seeing me EVERYDAY...:) 

This is so true! I have learned that the hard way this past couple of weeks. Just do it, get out there and meet some new people, and do some new things that you would not normally do :]

 Shout out to the brother, who came to see me in Rexy. he is single ladies:-)

The Truman/ Diamond Rio concert with Michael. I loved Truman, and Michael loved Diamond Rio, so it balanced out nicely:)

THINGS THAT MAKE MOLLY HAPPY:]

• walks at night with the besties
• being able to see the stars at night
• butterflies in my stomach for my friend ( i MIGHT be more excited for her than she is :]
• passing two difficult exams in one day!
• compliments on my skirt (LOVE that so much!)
• cooking in the kitchen 
• sleeping in 
• reading my patriarchal blessing
• sunshine- i love the warmth!
• fountain soda- SO much better than the can:)

all i can do is be me, whoever that is

i am molly ann thomas. aunt, college student, friend.

i think i might just want to be a hippie. no worries right?

i am happy when i am outside. 

 

i have this secret love for flowers. can't get enough of them!

i miss my kate. 

i fear squirrels. no joke- they terrify me. this dude is ready to pounce if you are not ready!

i feel lonely sometimes

i smell my candle from my Uncle's shop. It smells like lilac, only better :)

i usually have a diet coke within reach

i wonder about the future

i regret not going to senior prom

i love my family. ( we need a more recent photo with everyone actually in it)

i worry that i am not a good enough person.

i am not a social person by nature.

i remember being a kid and having no problems besides trying to figure out how to jump off the chicken roof without getting caught by mom.

i believe in jesus christ. he loves me:)

i sing in the shower

i dont always brush my hair after the shower. 

i dont like the center of attention on me

i write to remember my life

i win at air hockey against my bishop. like a boss

i want to go on a road trip. in THIS van.

i also want to try fishing. i have never done it before, but i feel like it might be awesome.


i lose my cell phone and keys all the time.

i dance when no one is watching me

i never do anything spontaneous. mental note: i should do that more.

i listen to every kind of music.  but right now, it is matt & kim. (if you have not heard of them, look them up RIGHT NOW!)

i dont understand math. it makes me mad.

i can be usually found with my good friend tori these days. she is such a peach, i don't know why she hangs out with me, i am a terrible friend :P

(seeing the lucky one- go see it ladies!)

i need my parents. they are always there for me, i just forget sometimes. (i also need another, more recent picture with my daddy)

and that's me!

things that make me happy, as of lately:

• disney movies
• mumford and sons on replay
• the sun, its so warrrrmmmm
• a clean room
• friendly neighbors
• recipes i find on pinterest
• avocado night with my girls allison and tori
• not expected mail
• movie night in IF with my friends from work
• the new testament- who knew it had such good stuff in it? :)

Its good to go home

So this past week I have been taking a break from reality, and I went home for the Spring Break.
Something that makes me so happy is that it is starting to act like Spring! 

If you look at the bottom left corner, there is a fat little bumble bee:) I was so happy this  morning when I woke up in MY BED and the window was open and I could smell the fresh air,the birds were chirping obnoxiously in the background and I got to snuggle up in my old blankets. Ah man, it was just fantastic! 

Aaaaand, I got to spend a night with my girlies! I love seeing these beauties when I come home, its definitely one of the highlights:)

I also had the opportunity to visit the grave of my good friends from working at Co Ag.  I became close to Levi and Tiffani the summer of 2010, and they both died unexpectedly in September of 2010. I took it kind of hard at first, but I am happy to say that each day I think I understand a little more about the Lord's timing:)

Rest in Peace, I love you guys!

I didn't take too many pictures on Easter before my ipod dies... sad day:/

But I did get a FEW pictures on Easter Sunday

THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY :)

• Mumford and Sons- I can't get enough of their album, its on repeat ;)
• Fresh air! Seriously, I took it for granted- my new apt's windows will NOT open:/
• My car works1
• Family <3
• Watching NCIS and Big Bang Theory with my mommy:)
• Getting compliments on my cooking!
• I get my own room this next semester!
• My hair is growing longer!!!
• I have a job lined up for the summer
• I have more books for my kindle than I could ever hope to read
• BASICALLY my life is just awesome. Its a good good life

PS-

Can I just say that my parents are awesome?! Sooo... I got myself into a spot of trouble because I made a few stupid judgement calls... My mom helped me out. She wasn't happy about the situation, but she didn't leave me high and dry. And my Dad? He answered his phone when I needed his help with buying a part for my car. He gave me his opinion, which I trust pretty much 100% when it comes to cars. Because my dad is a truck driver, he fixes his own truck quite a bit. Which results in a very studly father who can help his daughter out in a pinch when she has no idea what to buy. Aaand he called me later to see what I ended up buying, and wondering if it worked out.

I love my parents <3

I love my Chelsea :)

Chelsea Bowen

I love you so much! I got to see my Chelsea the day before she graduated... from college! First, we had to take some of Hailey's stuff to DI and it was sooooo sad :/ But then we went to WINGERS for lunch and it was delicious! My stomach was VERY full by the end. ( Their fry sauce was so good with the popcorn!)

 Last time in the car together, we rocked out to the song Firework by Katy Perry.

Later on she talked me into going to see Woman in Black at the cheap theater. I don't usually go for scary movies, but it was really fun to watch it in the movie theater with a good friend. I am going to miss you girl, I will definitely come see you in Utah in the fall! 

Utah

This last weekend I drove to see my sister Jane in Salt Lake City and had a great time. Every time, I get lost on the way to Jane's house and I have to call her and look an idiot. Geez. Maybe one of these times I will grow up and be able to get by on my own :)

Jane, Joe and I went to the new mall that just opened up in downtown Salt Lake City. It is so pretty! Part of it is outside, and part of it has a retractable ceiling, I thought that was pretty cool. The stores were so fancy and so many pretty things to look at!

Jane and I went to Whole Foods, and they had the prettiest flowers! It makes me so excited for springtime, because I am such a sucker for flowers.

 Saturday afternoon we all went to see The Hunger Games. I will admit, I was not very excited. I felt like I was going to be part of another culture clique so I purposely avoided the books. But I will admit that I was wrong. I really like the movie. A lot. Joe emailed me the books for my kindle and I may or may not have read the trilogy in 4 days... I fully recommend them to anyone over the age of 13! (They are slightly gruesome. However, Peeta will forever be my dream man- seriously he is perfect. )

After the movie, Jane took me to Old Spaghetti Factory for dinner for my birthday and it was delicious! Mmm...I love Italian food. 

Jane, Joe and I went for a walk through the Avenues right next to the U of U campus. SUCH pretty houses! But my favorite is the one on the right above, they have this really cool patio above their garage. Very nice use of space in my opinion.

Update on life!

So, I have been really slacking in the blogging department, but I promise to be better!
This semester has been great! I have been working in Idaho Falls, working at a preschool for developmentally disabled children- they are awesome! However, I am quitting my job when spring semester rolls around because it is just hard with time and gas money and so on. But I will be going back home for the 7 week break to work harvest (third year in a row- yay me, jk)




My birthday was a few weeks ago- shout out to my roommate Kate! She made it the BEST birthday I have had in a long time. She planned everything- we went to Paul Mitchell where I got my hair cut and styled just for my birfday. And she made my AMAZING cake and beautiful decorations. I got to share my birthday party with my good friend Matt Kelly, so much fun. We sang karaoke and made way too much noise. Matt and I shoved cake in each others faces ( I got him much better than he got me tee hee)  

Kate and I have this unhealthy obsession with thrifting at DI on the weekends. We may have actually been the last people leaving DI on Saturday night, and the manager may or may not have locked the door behind us...

I love Kate:)Best roommate!


Reasons to be happy:)
* General Conference is this weekend, and I am super excited!
* 6 more days of work, then I get to go home for a break
* Star Wars... So good
* My mommy loves me...:)
* Books! I miss reading, I need to get back into it, make us of my awesome new Kindle
* Road trips- I love leaving my problems behind

* On our way to a fantastic bonfire

Rexburg

So the past couple of weeks have been super stressful for me. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to have gone home, or if it was the right thing to do, coming back to Rexburg. I currently do not have a job... but I DO have a job interview tomorrow! Cross your fingers for me eh?


Anyways, I ended up getting a priesthood blessing from a friend, and man, it was powerful. I do not remember all of what he said other than to just stay firm in the gospel. But I will never forget that feeling. I literally could feel my heartbeat slow down, my chest and shoulders felt lighter, it was the most incredible feeling. 


I then had this super intense conversation with a good friend I just met named Zach.  He told me this, and I just love it so much I have to share it :
"and i learned an interesting thing about repentance and forgiveness once. how long does it take forgive?...........by the time you got to this sentence forgiveness could be complete. it takes practice and faith, but it's possible. it's harder to forgive yourself but it's just looking at it as "what's done is done" take care of it with the people you have to, the Lord, the bishop, and that's all you can do. i think my lack of short term memory helps me forgive people fast...but forgiving myself for what i did to others in the past was the hardest, especially when it came down to the choices they made because of what i said and did. but talk to people you affected and tell them you were wrong or whatever, that helps." 


This past couple of weeks have been really hard, but they have also been really crucial to the development of my faith and remembering that I need to trust the Savior, my big brother.Everything will be okay!




THINGS TO BE HAPPY ABOUT:]

•  my hair is growing long!
• priesthood blessings
• meaningful conversations with people you just met
•  prayer
• awesome roommates that are so understanding
• confidence- i got me some!
•  finding clothes on sale
• choice- you DO have it
• GREAT ward and FHE brothers, this is going to be a great semester!
• My family loves me :):):)
• working out... i love working out:)
• fresh starts, new beginnings